Surprise, Surprise!

Any first thing I am inclined to say won't sound anything less than ULTRA cheesy, but here it is.

I have a crush on someone.

After living for so long in the world of "Love will never exist for me again", I didn't see this one coming. This isn't love. This isn't anything, it's not even practical, or likely. But even so, it feels good. To feel the hint of a spark is almost more exciting than the fire. It is hope.

Funnily enough, he caught my eye the first time I saw him. (ULTRA cheesy) However I was an outsider, so I chose to stay outside, until yesterday. I decided to make an effort. Eventually we had a conversation, it was personal, encouraging, there was eye contact, and sincerity. Then it was time to leave, and he was leaving in the morning, for 6 weeks. I said good-bye, he gave me a hug, and a couple chatting minutes later, he gave me another hug.

When I left the snow was beautiful. I wasn't cold, or lonely. Just...pleasantly surprised.

Commitments in Perspective

You haven't given me a reason, to make me want to stay.

You haven't shown appreciation to make me feel OK.

You haven't given me the time of day,

You haven't ever gone out of your way,

to make me feel that I belong right here with you,

Well I've got bigger dreams,

And better things to do.

Beautiful Colors Sometimes Fade

Dearest Friend,

It's been a really long time since we became friends. We surprised everyone when things came up that logically said "our friendship shouldn't last." And now, insignificant things have driven us apart, so insignificant that I can't even find a word that would sum it up.

So I wrote to you to present the distance we have known, but refused to confront. I hope you choose to surmount this barrier with me, just as we have surmounted all the others.

I hope you also know that I value you immensely. And if we do part ways, I will grieve the loss of your friendship. You have been a beautiful color in my life and a never-ending source of laughter. We shared as many happy memories as we did tears. Our hearts were knit together and I hope that you can understand how much you have meant to me.

With unending love,

Your Friend